How NLP Changed My Life

2008 was a transformative year for me. I had long been identified as a “high potential” by my employer, Vodafone, and I’d delivered some great results for my part of the UK, transforming a wide tranche of stores into some of the UK’s best, and this was the year we won the National CX award. I was also awarded the honour of being a Vodafone UK “Legend”, one of 100 employees recognized nationally each year, as voted for by peers and line managers.

I was also the first Regional Manager to achieve 100% in a Mystery Shop survey, in one of the stores I’d been visiting, which happened to get VERY busy while I was there, so I engaged customers myself and served them. Little did I know that my customer was a paid Mystery Shopper!

All of a sudden my stores had no excuses, and neither did any of the sales advisors. If the RM could get 100%, someone who did not serve customers day to day, then how could the teams justify poor scores for not following process and procedure? How could they fail to build enough rapport with their customers, and NOT delight them each and every time.

While that turbo-charged our sales performance, and set a benchmark for the UK that no-one else could follow, I’d been asked to attend a very intensive training course.

NLP, or “neuro-linguistic programming” is often mis-understood. Thanks to celebrities like Derren Brown, who base their “mentalist” shows on some of the core tenets of NLP, the practice has been used for a long time in the USA, but was slowly becoming more popular in the UK.

At it’s heart - NLP is the study of success. Why do some people seem to have it, and what are the common factors that most successful people have? The course itself was a 3 month “pre-learning” period - with workbooks and over 48 hours of lectures to listen to. Which then resulted in not one but TWO very intensive residential training courses.

The Learning Experience

Working through 48 hours of audio listening, with a guided workbook was not easy. I still had a day job, so this was like night school. As a visual learner, this was a new experience for me, and one I tried very hard to adapt to. I put in the hard yards.

The residential events were EXHAUSTING. Each one 5 days long, the sheer amount of brain power it took to challenge my views on EVERYTHING, meant that evenings were a series of early nights, and of trying to quiet the brain. Sleep was everything on this course.

It’s not for the feint hearted, but I can honestly say this changed my life, for the better. I’ll dive into the 5 main learnings in the next section, but some of the other things I learned on this course were life altering experiences.

For example, I learned a lot about phobias, and the body and mind’s natural response when in a “fight or flight” mode. I had long had a gag reflex to raw tomatoes (strange yes!) which came from a childhood incident tied to an overly strict teacher, a lunch time recoil to said tomato, and then my father’s reaction to add to the discipline I was dished out by my strict teacher. Dad’s reaction was worse - and thus my hatred of the tomato was born.

I was able to eat a piece of tomato in the course.

The 5 Things I Learned - The TL:DR Version!

I could write a book on what I actually did learn - but here are the 5 main things I wanted to share;

1) Rapport Building

Using advanced behavioral techniques, I learned how to mirror body language, tone and language patterns in order to quickly create connections with people. As a young extrovert who has become slowly more introverted over time, this is invaluable as a skill - and I’d liken it to being an actor, and deciding when to be “on stage”, and which character trait to portray when on that stage!

2) Anchoring

This goes back to my tomato. Being able to associate a physical gesture, word or trigger with an emotional state means I can bring that state back on demand, at the click of a finger. Powerful stuff this.

3) Reframing

This really sits with me now. I use it a lot, especially when teaching my son life lessons. The ability to make any situation into a sad, dark tale, or a soft, light, beautiful vista is amazing, and I often change perspectives on things in all aspects of my life now.

4) Questioning

Understanding how to subtly change language to influence the outcome you want is something I really brough into my sales career. Using the Meta Model to uncover the real motivations and needs behind things. Understanding the hierarchical order of things, and of chunking down and up to understand where your subject is at a moment in time during your conversation.

5) Conversational Hypnosis Language

The Milton Model is used to persuade and influence customers. It’s something very subtle, and most people will not notice, but they will FEEL the difference. It uses artfully vague and persuasive language to guide your subjects thinking, especially if you know they may be resistant.

How NLP Shaped Showtime

Looking back, it’s no exaggeration to say that NLP changed the course of my career. What started as an intensive, exhausting training programme soon became the foundation of how I approached leadership, coaching, and ultimately, sales. The lessons of rapport, anchoring, reframing, questioning, and conversational language didn’t just make me a better manager at Vodafone - they transformed the way I connected with people. They gave me tools to unlock performance in myself and others, in ways that standard sales training never could. I’m now a fully registered “Practitioner” of NLP, certified by the American Board of NLP (ABNLP).

But here’s the catch: those techniques were hidden away in specialist courses, buried in jargon, and reserved for those fortunate enough to be “high potentials” or sent on executive programmes. That never sat right with me. Why should the secrets of success be kept for the few, when it’s the many - frontline sales advisors in busy telco stores - who need them the most?

That’s why I created Showtime. It was my way of taking the life-changing principles of NLP and packaging them into something practical, accessible, and telco-specific. Showtime strips away the fluff and delivers these techniques in a way any sales rep can use immediately - whether they’re greeting customers, handling objections, or closing a deal.

The result? Salespeople who feel confident, equipped, and ready to deliver magical customer experiences every time. Because when powerful psychology meets telco retail training, the impact is extraordinary. Showtime exists to make sure no one is left guessing at how to succeed - they’re shown how to perform, and how to win.

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Conclusion:

NLP changed my life. It’s rare to encounter such a powerful reaction to a training event. So as a conclusion, I’d urge you to go find your “NLP”. Not only can it change the way you think about things, it can impact your career prospects, improve your interpersonal relationships and just outright make you a better person.

It might even inspire you to create, which is what I’ve done in my later career, firstly in my day job, and in bringing Showtime to life, and secondly, in my free time, writing not one but two science fiction novels and achieving a life long dream of getting them published.

More about that in other episodes of my twice a month newsletter. Thanks for subscribing, and if now is a good time to SHARE this with your audience, I’d be really appreciative of your help. Till next time!